March Madness

The bell rings and students file out of classrooms heading to their next class. Its just another ordinary day at EBHS, but hold on a minute something is different. Almost everyone is wearing pyjamas. Everywhere you look fleece pants, sweatpants, flanel pyjamas, footsie pyjamas. Did everyone oversleep today?

Nope, march madness has simply returned to EBHS. Its time for crazy costumes, face paint, shamrocks, and school spirit once again. Its time for fierce competition between the classes; for the freshman to get smushed and the seniors to rein triumphant. Most of all however, its time for the junior class to step up.

The current March Madness standings place the junior class in fourth just ahead of the freshman and below the faculty. As upperclassmen this standing is beyond pathetic and the old excuse, "Why try, its rigged anyway," isn't going to work anymore. If it was really rigged, why are we loosing?

Many juniors dress up in the craziest costumes and make march madness as fun as possible, but others simply don't even try. Perhaps its because they are too shy or because they don't have any school pride-true EBHS is falling down-but I say, "Shut the Shamrock Up!" March Madness is a chance to have some fun in school and beat the monotony of the long month of March-and for the upperclassmen to crush freshman. SO COME ON JUNIORS! LET THOSE SHAMROCKS SHINE!

Dairy Cows at Daybreak

The following is a fictional story:

East Bridgewater residents were astonished to find ten cows grazing on the high school's football field early Monday morning.

The cows had escaped from the nearby barn at Peaceful Meadows in Whitman. The management there believes that the cows wandered out of their barn around midnight via a side door carelessly left open by a new trainee. "After they got out, I guess they just wandered around town looking for a good grazing spot," said manager Susan LaGlace, "They've had quite the adventure!"

For the cows their grazing elysium was EBHS football field. They were discovered there, happily feasting, by student Kelly Moore when she arrived for school at 6:30. Moore had arrived early to take a make-up chemistry test and discovered the cattle after she parked her car in the back lot. "I was just thinking ok, I know its early, but I can't be hallucinating cows. Can I?" said Kelly.

After realizing that this was indeed not a dream, Kelly did the only thing she could do, she called the fire department. After arriving, the fire fighters were baffled by the unusual task they had been set. They had to contain the cows before school started, so they herded the cows into the adjacent, enclosed tennis courts. The resourceful fire fighters used boards, ladders, trucks and any thing else handy to guide the scared cows. Students arriving for school were befuddled by the sight of the heifers wandering among the tennis nets.

Soon, the fire department received a panicked call from the Peaceful Meadow staff searching for the bodacious bovines. By 10:00 all the cows had been boarded onto the barn's cattle car and were headed home. "They are back at their stable safe and sound, sleeping off their late-night escapade," said barn manager Ary Holstein, "I don't think they'll be up for another adventure for a long time."

Canine Crusader (Hourglass Story)

The following a fictional story:

A local dog did her civic duty Thursday night when she stopped a criminal from fleeing the scene of a bank robbery in Hanover.

The suspect, 35 year old George Smith, held up Petco in Hanover, demanding $100,000. He was wearing a Halloween costume and carrying a dictionary disguised as a bomb. After receiving his ransom, Smith tried to make his getaway.

Luckily, Artemis, a four year old, Samoyed was shopping with her owner. Perceiving the threat, Artemis charged and took down the suspect, without any previous training. She then proceeded to hold down Smith until the police arrived.

The police recount the incident:

Eight AM Thursday morning Smith entered the Hanover Petco dressed as a giant banana and carrying a standard Webster's dictionary. He then proceeded to the first cashier and demanded the money from all the registers and the safe. When the cashier refused, he told her that the dictionary was actually a bomb. The cashier than got the manager, who gave Smith the money.

Thinking that he had gotten away with the perfect crime, George sprinted out the door towards his 2011 Chevy Camaro. Suddenly, the brave Artemis broke away from her owner a sprinted after the suspect. After catching up to him, she clamped down onto his arm and refused to let go-a technique used by police dogs, but never taught to Artemis. The Samoyed managed to hold her quarry until the police arrived and arrested Smith.

Artemis will be presented an award Sunday by Governor Patrick for her bravery.

The Last Great Race on Earth

The air is filled with tension. People are cheering. Dogs are barking and straining against their harnesses. Suddenly, BANG! The team lurches forward; the dogs running at their best, enjoying every minute of it.

It's that time of year again. This Saturday at 10 AM 62 teams embark from Anchorage Alaska on a 1,131 mile odyssey to Nome. That's right the Iditarod is about to kick off.

A tradition since 1973, the Iditarod Trail Dog Sled Race embodies the Alaskan spirit and honors the brave dog teams that helped settle the area. It tests the endurance of both the dogs and musher as they travel across vast, beautiful, and dangerous landscape. Nicknamed "The Last Great Race on Earth" it attracts spectators and mushers alike from all over the world. It is truly a phenomenon.

The race will be broadcast on the local station, GCI Cable 1. However, for those of us living in the lower 48, the entire race broadcast can be found on http://iditarod.com/ by signing up for the Iditarod Insider-$19.95 for the video or GPS tracker or $39.95 for both.